4 and a Half Checks
by Nellbell222
Summary: 4 and a half checks. Damn you Witch Weekly! Damn your extremely preceptive associates that know every teenage girl's inner thoughts! And damn you for making Potter the most bearable human being on the planet! Oneshot!


**A/N: This one-shot wouldn't leave me alone! Enjoy! Oh and I don't know if there were looney toons but it fit so I went with it. **

**4 and a Half Checks**

**By: Nellbell222**

**PICK WHICH LOVE YOU AND YOUR BOYFRIEND OR CRUSH HAVE! **

Unconditional love: You love your crush no matter what, under ALL circumstances. No matter how annoying he is.

**Check. **

Infatuation: Loving feelings towards your hottie that are largely based on fantasy. Make it a reality!

**Check. **And easier said than done.

Unrequited Love: Love that isn't returned or denied. Hopefully the apple of your eye just doesn't see what a great girl you are and you haven't been denied!

**Check. **

Eros: Passionate love usually involving sexual feelings for a love interest. Oooo! You have the extreme hots for this guy bad if this is your type of love!

**Check. **

Romantic Love: Love for a partner with whom you feel passion, attraction, caring and respect. Usually returned. This is the most likely love of them all! Congrats for you if it is!

**Check. **Well, more like **half check**. Lily didn't know if it was returned. Hell, she didn't even think it **was **returned. Considering he has that tart, slag of a girlfriend. She knew that they had sex in broom cupboards. He had even told her after a Head meeting for Merlin's sake!

'Gotta so shag, Herring. Catch ya later Evans!'Yeah, catch you later. Oh, wait! Didn't you just say that you would be shagging Samantha's brains out later? Oh right! You must have had a moment of obliviation. Don't worry about me! I will just be sitting in the common room pining away for you. Unwillingly think about you and I shagging. I won't wait up.

She stared at the page in Witch Weekly some more. Damn you stupid, trashy, useless magazine that is probably more informative than any of the textbooks right now! Damn you from keeping her from her homework! Damn you for informing her that she was close to jumping Potter during their patrols! Damn you for telling her that she loves him in every single way possible!

Damn you for making Potter an actual bearable human being that is sexy, smart, good looking, caring, witty, hilarious, personable, slightly dangerous and an unbelievably good friend! And making him smell nice! Well, maybe it isn't their fault but Lily needed someone to blame. So, damn it all! It is going to be Witch Weekly's fault!

She huffed a long sigh and sat back on her bed. She should hex Marlene into the next century for giving her that shitty magazine. It single-handedly ruined her life in a few minutes by pointing out that she was a spineless groupie who worshiped every orifice of James Charlus Potter. Merlin, she was pathetic! She climbed off the bed and slowly traveled down the stairs to the Head Common room. Lily peeked her head around the corner to look for Potter and she was relieved to see that it was empty. He and Samantha had been spending way too much time around the common room lately.

She tiptoed down the three steps and looked up to where James's room was located. The door was sealed shut. Lily breathed a sigh of relief and tightened her grip on the Witch Weekly magazine.

As she made her way to the couch, Lily was still suspicious of the whereabouts of Potter but the clock said it was around eleven so he was most likely in his room for the night. Unless he was 'shagging Herring'. She shivered at the thought a laid on the couch.

Like usual; she was wrong about Potter.

Around one in the morning, the portrait hole that hid the head's dorm opened up and James Potter crept through. Lily was shook awake at the sound and sent a harsh stinging hex towards the intruder.

"Ouch! Merlin, Lily! What was that for?"

Oh great Lily! You just zapped the boy you love with your hardest stinging hex. Really good way to win him over. You are a genius. Right on.

"Potter! I thought you were in your room?"

He shook his head and looked at Lily funny. Now look Lily! He thinks you're a nutter!

"Why would you need to know that I was in my room?" Lily gulped. Even better! Now he thinks you stalk him. Add that right under that she previously hated him and he thinks she is a nutter for being in the common room until one in the morning.

"Umm…I'm kind of having a stake-out? With those Witch Weekly editors on the loose and stuff. Did you know that I think they may be from hell? Devil spawn? Worse than Voldemort himself"

Lily Evans, what a sexy, smart, suave young woman. Witch Weekly editors are worse than Voldemort? If he had any doubt that she was nutter then there is none now. She groaned slightly. Maybe he would just drop it or play along? Merlin, he probably thinks she is wasted.

"Oh, I heard that! Death Eaters are in fetal positions in the corner from the wrath of professional gossipers." He smirked and Lily felt her try to escape from her rib cage. **That **was why she loved him. **That **was why she was acting like a complete Looney toon.

"Yeah, I had to protect my fellow head right? What would I do without you? Hogesmeade trips would take twice as long to plan." His grin spread farther across his face and Lily felt like she might faint. God she would like to kiss those lips.

"That would be too bad. Oh! I see you were going to fight fire with fire? That new WW magazine looks pretty menacing. What is the major headline this week?" He grabbed the magazine before Lily could tackle him and make him suspicious. Good thing she only made mental check marks. That would be hard to explain if there were little checks next to all of the boxes.

"Hmm…what kind of love do you have? Let me see…check, check, check, check, check. Well for that last one it might be a half check."

Lily raised an eyebrow. He did checks too? And why was the last one only half check? And why did he have unrequited love? Samantha Herring had most likely proven that she loved him ten times over.

"What do you mean half check? Samantha obviously returns the love. You guys are dating."

Then, James did something that made her think about the first love; unconditional love. He was laughing at her like she was some child. Yet, she couldn't be mad at him for more than a millisecond. Not when he had such a nice laugh.

"Oh, Lily, do you really not know? I don't love Samantha. Never have, never will. It's another girl I'm talking about. Can you please guess?"

Dear Merlin, if it was her, she will laugh at every 'Sirius, serious' joke for as long as she lived.

"I have an idea but I don't think you will ever love this girl. She has treated you so badly in the past."

"C'mon Evans. Guess. I promise I won't get offended if you get it wrong."

Lily swallowed. This was her chance for 5 checks and all five loves of James Potter. Take a leap Lily! Get him away from that tart's hands.

"Me?"

His grin did not widen and Lily felt like crying. It. Wasn't. Her.

"Oh, Lily…" She felt like a fool. Thinking that James Potter could love her was a fantasy. His voice was filled with pity and she wanted to run but her feet were nailed to the floor.

"…you are so smart."

Her eyes lifted off the floor and his face was lit up. She stepped closer to him and he closed the distance between them so her pajamas were touching his dirty Quidditch robes.

"Lucky guesser."

"Well, I am glad you are because if you had guessed someone like Gilda Parkinson then I would have never had the courage to do this."

And with that, James Potter and Lily Evans had their first kiss. It wasn't sweet and innocent but passionate and lustful just as two seventeen year olds would be expected to be. When they finally broke apart, James smiled at Lily.

"You got your five checks."

Lily shook her head and he frowned. "No, I actually got four checks. This certainly isn't unrequited love."


End file.
